An excuse for simp, am I right?
It’s another Valentine’s Day in quarantine, which means it’s another Valentine’s Day alone for many of us. What we do have, however, is access to a whole lot of video games, and that got me thinking about my sexiest video game characters, or more specifically what I think are video game voices the sexiest. Anyone can make a hunky beefcake or a buxom blonde out of a character model, but to me a big part of what makes some video game characters sexy is their voices.
I can’t pass up the sultry tones of these standout performances, so here’s my list of the sexiest video game voices.
1. Meg’s underworld
underworld is filled with sexy character designs and voice, but the star for me was Megara. I have a weakness for low and rocky voices, what can I say? Plus, there was this whole denial stuff that I usually hate, but really got me in trouble when it comes to her. There were lots of fun romance options in this game, but there was no contest when it came to my game: it had to be Meg.
2. Reservation from Bioshock Infinite
Booker was one of my first computer game crushes. Everything about his character design appeals to me, with the obvious exception that he’s a mass murderer. The game is chock full of DILF, but Booker is definitely on top in my opinion. Infinite is a first-person game, so don’t see him at all while he’s running it – that means his voice has to do a lot of work when it comes to making him sexy, and as questionable as Troy Baker behaved lately i can’t ignore the performance he gave while making this game.
3. Garrus of Mass Effect
I’m going to equate with you guys – the prospect of being able to crush aliens in Mass Effect is like 70% of why I decided to play these games, and I mean in a sexy way. As soon as I met the cast, Garrus was at the top of my list. He already has a head start as the least annoying team member in my opinion, and there’s something about the voice effects they applied to him that really does something for me. I was a bit disappointed to learn that I won’t be able to crush him until Game 2, but that gives me something to look forward to.
4. Chloe from Unexplored
The low, rocky voice is back, and I can’t get enough of it. Chloe was introduced to Unexplored series as another potential love interest for Nate, and as much as I love Elena, I would have gone for Chloe every time. She’s attractive, adventurous, and has one of the best voices in a series full of incredible voice talent. Like Booker, Chloe was one of my earliest video game crushes, so I will always hold a special place in my heart for her.
5. Arthur Morgan of Red Dead Redemption 2
You know what else I have a thing for? Cowboys. And Arthur Morgan is about as sexy as it gets, vocally speaking. I mean, I guess that’s how you talk, isn’t it? Either way, Arthur has it all – the southern accent, the twang, the grit. He may not be reinventing the idea of the cowboy sound, but if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. He gives us the epitome of the South American country boy, and as someone who thinks that accent is criminally understated in discussions of supposed sex appeal, I’m a little obsessed with it.
6. Lady Dimitrescu of Resident Evil Village
Another entry on this list that is sort of a given. I think I belong to the minority of people who feel the tall thing just doesn’t do it for them, but I have to admit his voice is some of the sexiest I’ve heard from a video game character. Lady D has a certain elegance to her voice, which contrasts nicely with some of the other more rugged characters I have on this list. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still terrified of her and this game, but I have to admit there’s something about her voice that really appeals to me.
7. Boxer Transistor
Boxer technically has no name in the world of Transistor, but that’s what the fans affectionately call it, so that’s what I’m going to do too. I wanted to talk about the amazing voice work that Logan Cunningham did in this role in my column on Transistorbecause it’s one of my favorite voice performances in a game (and I also think it’s the sexiest).
It’s ironic that Boxer is on this list, because in the game he’s basically alone a voice. There’s also something so romantic about her relationship with Red in the game, although we don’t really know that. Either way, it makes me want to play again. Transistor today, in the spirit of the holidays.
Well, that’s my list for Valentine’s Day. Do you agree with my choices? Who do you think are the sexiest voices in video games? Let’s discuss it in the comments!